vending machines

Category: Joke Board

Post 1 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Tuesday, 26-Sep-2006 17:53:36

A salesman checked into a futuristic motel.
Realizing he needed a haircut before the next day's meeting he called down to the desk to ask if there was a barber on the premises.
"I'm afraid not sir," the clerk told him apologetically, but down the hall from your room is a vending machine that should serve your purposes.
Skeptical but intrigued, the salesman located the machine, inserted $15.00, and stuck his head in the opening, at which time the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later the salesman pulled out his head and surveyed his reflection, which reflected the best haircut of his life.
Two feet away was another machine with a sign that read, Manicures, $20.00.
"Why
not?" thought the salesman. He paid the money,, inserted his hands into the slot, and the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later he pulled out his hands and they were perfectly manicured.
The next machine had a sign that read, 'This machine Provides a Service Men Need When Away from Their Wives' 50 Cents. The salesman looked both ways, put fifty cents in the machine, unzipped his fly, and with some anticipation, stuck his manhood into the opening. When the machine started buzzing, the guy let out a shriek of agony and almost passed out. Fifteen seconds later it shut off. With trembling hands, the salesman was able to withdraw his tender unit...which now had a button sewed on the end

Post 2 by frequency (the music man) on Tuesday, 26-Sep-2006 18:05:46

hahahaha

Post 3 by Bryan (This site is so "educational") on Tuesday, 26-Sep-2006 18:11:26

lol, go ahead becky, hugs

Post 4 by motifated (I've now got the silver prolific poster award! wahoo!) on Tuesday, 26-Sep-2006 21:30:46

Becky, that's been around for a long time since I was about twelve or thirteen. I forgot about it. Seeing that joke reminds me of exactly where and when I heard it, and what I was doing. Thanks for reminding me of a classic.

Lou

Post 5 by Blue Velvet (I've got the platinum golden silver bronze poster award.) on Wednesday, 27-Sep-2006 7:24:31

I didn't realize it was a classic. It was new to me. But glad you enjoyed hearing it again, Lou.

Post 6 by laced-unlaced (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 27-Sep-2006 10:06:10

lol. i like that one

Post 7 by blbobby (Ooo you're gona like this!) on Wednesday, 27-Sep-2006 11:26:23

Becky, that's good.
Fyi, that button sure does hurt too.

Bob

Post 8 by buk buk buk (move over school!) on Friday, 29-Sep-2006 0:26:48

ehhehehehe Nice